Grumpy
Very grumpy
Why?
Because I can be
Hide it
Had to hide it
Couldn’t be angry
Couldn’t be grumpy
Sad
Inside sadness
Feeling pushed aside
Boundaries
Fucking boundaries
I hate them
Rigid boundaries
What I always had
One rule for everyone
One rule for me
Couldn’t
Mustn’t
Don’t
Fuck it!!
Anger
Deep down anger
You can’t
You mustn’t
Be good
Be good
Fuck be good
Do what you’re told
Puppet on a string
Dance to the tune
Others can, you can’t
I’m tired of it
I’m bruised by it
I’m sad
Why can’t I……………
Why?
Kazza
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8 comments:
You can, dear Kazza. Now you can.
Sometimes I think I've still got to stick by the "good girl" rules Kahless. And by boundaries, in case I upset someone or they get angry with me. It's probably my own rigid boundaries that stops me from being freer. It's amazing how deeply ingrained messages are, that are learnt as kids.
Yes, these rules are ingrained deep.
I've got PMT at the moment and it makes me extra sensitive to different things too and I was in such a grumpy mood yesterday.
I am a grumpy git. Mrs K says to me...
"sometimes I wake up grumpy.
Sometimes I leave her to sleep in."
;-)
I've heard that one. LOL At least living by myself there's no one to witness my bad mood. LOL It used to be that I got very down with PMT and while I still do occassionally, I get more angry now!!
I wonder how many women are locked are in prison for crimes committed whilst PMT!
I would say there would be a few Kahless!! LOL My mind just goes into chaos when I'm due. I'm sensitive about every little thing.
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